[This post is my angry rant about a certain group of people that I cannot actually name nor address but its purely to get my opinion and anger out]
You people disgust me! You treat your fucking kids like absolute shit! They are not your slaves nor walking child benefit and you can't treat them that way. Just because you dislike me you asshole, well you're screwed because NOBODY fucks with me, I said nobody and you ain't nothing fucking special. So what you're older? it don't mean SHIT. You know fuck-all about good parenting.
Good for you, you don't like me, not many do but I dare you, fuck me over again, go on, I dare you, one fucking more time. We'll see who will make who feel this small *makes small gesture with hands* And this ain't about me and him, we were best friends before you fucktard, I would do this for all of my family because that's how I consider my friends. You aren't a parent, you don't know the fucking meaning of the word asshole! Get your filthy ass back to school and look it up! A parent doesn't cut their kid off from their friends like that, you're shit's twisted man. You can't treat them differently prick parents don't do that. People like you, I often question how assholes like you get laid and end up fucking married! What is the fucking world coming to?? Boohoo for you because I'll be around for a long long fucking time and you'll just have to face it, biatch. Toughen up ya wee prick, you can't even look me in the fucking eyes well guess what bitch? You just met your worst nightmare. And you ain't gonna get away from me. Haha deal with it you FUCKTARD! ;)
And onto you, you mental whoring bitch! You're worse than him although he's not much fucking better. And you're a low little cunt, you like to hit him where it really fucking hurts. That's just your style, eh? Well, you should see my style. You're about to. You may wanna fear it like you fear God you stupid bitch! I'm going to destroy you because you are NOTHING. NOTHING. You think you can take the stuff I give to him you whore? It don't belong to you mentally ill crazy bitch so give it THE FUCK BACK why the fuck would he steal that its obvious you are telling a few white lies, eh? Well tut-tut that's not in my rule book so it ain't gonna be allowed im afraid. So you wanna know what I'm gonna do? eh nah it's cool I'll just let it surprise you honey :D Now THAT'S the way I roll... You are so fucking mentally ill now go get help you bitch or do us all a favour and fuck off. Seriously, what has he ever done to you? and apart from that, I was nice to you at first so don't you even try speaking about me behind my back! Fucking hag. You need to watch the way you talk to me!!
Stupid fucktards, I will DESTROY you all. Easily. So wise the fuck up bitch cause I ain't going nowhere for a long long time ;) LOTS AND LOTS OF LOVE Kathryn xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Mwah! x
Not had a proper post in a while, thought it was a little overdue. Was thinking about life and our prospects. What we hold dear and what we choose to discard. Things we plan for, hope for, work for and things we dread.
Honestly, what is the world coming to now? People break into fights with each other over what exactly? Someone said or did something to your best friend's cousin's sister's boyfriend so you must "defend your friends" I'm sorry, who do you think you are? You have no fucking reason to be angry nor do you have any legit reason for battering lumps out each other. There are other people in this world that have far better reasons than you to get mad and yet we don't go about like that. We sit quiet as always, forever ignored and overlooked. Hell if we had a fight, you'd be dead in seconds. So don't you dare turn round and try and give yourself a reason because you are just a bunch of pathetic Show offs. Oh I can fight cause I'm tough, no you can't so sit down you little cunt! Go back to your Call Of Duty game, for fucksake and give us all some peace/
And Rich kids too. They don't value life. By rich i don't mean just have money. I'm talking about little posh bastards that Mummy and Daddy have given them every fucking thing possible and they're still not grateful. Got into Oxford and not Eaton so they run away and cry. Toughen up ya wee prick! Make your life your own and stop using your Daddy's credit card. They have no values or realistic terms in life. They don't know about Homelessness or being without food for two days. Having everything in your possession smashed and broken. Having no heating, no hot running water. No money. No job. Gangs, Taxes, Council Estates, Illness, the NHS....They don't have this shit to deal with so why should we! Pick yourself up and make your own life without relying on your parents money. It's not what's important!
We should hold onto Hope. We should Get rid of Doubt. I actually came up with a little saying last night at quarter to three. Yes, I tend to get inspired around that time on sleepless nights before exams:
Today is a day of Weakness. Today is a day of Doubt. But tomorrow will be better And of that, I have no Doubt.
heh, not bad for in the middle of the night, eh? It's pretty accurate and its how I made it through last night. Unsurprisingly, I got very frustrated with my Chemistry studying and then couldn't sleep. To top it all off, those are the kind of bad times when I would go to my Mum. And that's what set off the crying no doubt. You can send yourself to pretty dark places in the middle of the night with nothing to wake up to. And all of that set off the craving for the fags again. Hm, I'm not doing very well am I?
We should hold our Loved ones dear as well. I don't know just how many things I would take back and do differently with my Mum. Like when she was ill, just cause she got better I should've been there. Last time we coherently talked it was on the phone. And that's as painful as a stab through the heart now. I should have been there in person. But even so, just those few short moments on the phone with her, just casually chatting is enough to keep me sane. So please, if you have ill or sick relatives or even if they're fine, DON'T WASTE A SECOND. I would take back all the fights. I'd give up everything just to have a 5 minute conversation with her now. Don't take love for granted!
Hate is another thing. People are so bitter so easily over the stupidest things. Why can't we just be happy for each other!!! For example, when you see your Exes, I can bet NO ONE smiles or smiles honestly. After bad things happen, you start to see who really does matter. We may be young but it doesn't mean nothing is unforgivable. Some things are. Look after each other better. Society has a lack of this now which is pretty damn sad. There used to be a time when we would sacrifice ourselves just to make sure our friends and family saw the next daylight. Where has this bond gone?
We should hold onto our strength. Some people think its "amazing" that I'm still doing my exams after my Mum. But its not "amazing" It's just strength. If I personally couldn't do it, I would fear for myself as a person. You need that kind of strength in life because there will always be people who disagree and who bring up problems. You have to be ready for that. It's a cruel uncaring world out there. You have to be prepared for hate.
Another thing: Just because you fight doesn't mean you don't love each other. Everyone fights. So what if one screwed up?! There's not a soul on this earth that hasn't not done something wrong, something they regret. I have thousands of those moments. I would change them if I could. As Eminem puts it, My insecurities could eat me alive. I have bad traits that I'm not proud of in fact they disgust me, I disgust me. But I know no one else is perfect either so I accept it.
So onlookers, stop judging someone. They may have done bad and you have to forgive, not forget NEVER forget but Forgive. As best as you can. Don't judge unless you are prepared to be judged. Harshly, might I add. I understand you are protecting your friend but you can't change how things are. If someone's in love they just are. Why should it matter how bad the person they love is? No one else plays by the rule book so why the fuck should we have to?
Love is Love. End of.
I'll finish this on a lighter note, some Eminem I think. Check this shit:
{On Thursday 3rd May 2012, my Mum sadly passed away in her sleep} This is my letter to her:
Dear Mum,
You were the best mother I could have wished for. God blessed me with a kind and caring mother and I couldn't be more grateful for even just knowing you for the short sixteen years. I am honored to be your Daughter! You were a beautiful intelligent and ambitious woman and always pushed me to do my best even when I thought I didn't have the strength to do so. You showed me the meaning of strength and perseverance at a time when I didn't believe there was anything good left in the world.
There was never a time you weren't there for me Mum, especially when I had severe depression, you got me through it and supported me every night and day until I got back to School. You were so wise and always gave the best advice, even if I didn't take it at the time, later I'd realise that you were right all along. You were the best mother and there's not a memory from my childhood where you weren't playing games with me and my sister or singing to us.
I love you and I'm so sad you're gone after fighting cancer for 9 years. You were only 56 and you had another 30 odd years left in you, its just a shame you didn't get a chance to live that out. But you were suffering and I'm glad that suffering ended so that you're at peace now and I can tell you're watching over me. There's so many things I want to tell you and share with you, even just to sit down beside you and just get a hug from you when I'm having a bad day. But you'll be forever in my heart my angel and you're in Heaven in the best place you could be. I just wish we could have had more time to do all the things we'd planned like for my wedding and when I have children. I'll tell them all about you but it makes me sad they'll never see your beautiful face or talk to you.
Another thing is that I wish you and J could have had more time to get to know each other because you're both great and quite alike actually. I know you'll watch over both of us because you could see that we loved each other. I wish you could be with me in the physical sense but I can feel you here with me even if I can't see you. I hope I'm as good a Mum to my children as you were to me.
